The test of any good fiction is that you should care something for the characters; the good to succeed, the bad to fail. The trouble with most fiction is that you want them all to land in hell together, as quickly as possible.
- Mark Twain
He said that everything in this world, small or large, was created for a reason. Even the smallest mosquito that bites people and makes them itch. There is wisdom behind that itch, in that it can be a substitute for a corresponding irritation in Hell. He said that every trouble we land in comes from a sin which would not be forgiven without that trouble.
- Leila Aboulela
If marriages are said to be made in heaven then why search for grooms in hell.
- Amit Abraham
God will roast their stomachs in hell at the hands of Iraqis.
- Mohammed Saeed Al Sahaf
But how to explain suffering because of a man? It's not explainable. With that kind of suffering, a person feels as if they're in hell, because there is no nobility, no greatness - only misery.
- Paulo Coelho
It is easy to suffer for a cause or for a mission; this ennobles the heart of the person suffering. But how to explain suffering because of a man? It's not explainable. With that kind of suffering, a person feels as if they're in hell, because there is no nobility, no greatness - only misery.
- Paulo Coelho
she didn't need anyone. At Wheeler, even when she stood out with her pink hair and quilter army-surplus jacket and combat bots, she did this without apology. It was a great irony that the very fact of a relationship with her would diminish her appeal, that the moment she came to love me back and depend on me as much as I depended on her, she would no longer be a truly independent spirit. No way in hell was I going to be the one to take that quality away from her.
- Jodi Picoult
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women.
(Keynote speech at Celebrating Inspiration luncheon with the WNBA's All-Decade Team, 2006)
- Madeleine Albright
I also think it is important for women to help one another. I have a saying: There is a special place in hell for women who don't.
- Madeleine Albright
There's people in hell who want ice water.
- Nelson Algren
I know I got it made while the masses of black people are catchin' hell, but as long as they ain't free, I ain't free.
- Muhammad Ali
The hottest places in hell are reserved for those who, in time of great moral crisis,
maintain their neutrality.
- Dante Alighieri,philosopher/poet
- Dante Alighieri
The path to paradise begins in hell.
- Dante Alighieri
The darkest places in hell are reserved for those who maintain their neutrality in times of moral crisis.
- Dante Alighieri
They're still looking at him.... At Will..."
"Of course they are.... Look at him. The face of a bad angel and eyes like the night sky in Hell.
- Cassandra Clare
Look at him. The face of a bad angel and eyes like the night sky in Hell. He's very pretty, and vampires like that. I can't say I mind either.
- Cassandra Clare
Please do it your own way.
Do it in the mornings when your mind is cold
Do it in the evenings when everything is sold.
Do it in the springtime when springtime isn't there
Do it in the winter
We know winter well
Do it on very hot days
Try doing it in hell.
Trade bed for a pencil
Trade sorrow for a page
No work it out your own way
Have good luck at your age.
- Ernest Hemingway
I don't allow people of your sort to stand in my way. That's what you're leaving out of account. I'm having Christine because it's my right. Do you understand that? If I'm after something, I don't care what I do to make sure that I get it. That's the only law I abide by; it's the only was to get things in this world...With me you just haven't a hope in hell.
- Kingsley Amis
I wish I had cancer. I will burn in hell for that, but it's true.
- Laurie Halse Anderson
If somebody ever wished to be me for a day, they'd be the most pissed-off person once they got here. They would be, like, in hell.
- Jennifer Aniston
That the saints may enjoy their beatitude and the grace of God more abundantly they are permitted to see the punishment of the damned in hell.
- Thomas Aquinas
You in my life, me livin' in hell, feels like I've been touched by an angel.
- Kristen Ashley
There is nothing frightening about an eternal dreamless sleep. Surely it is better than eternal torment in Hell and eternal boredom in Heaven.
- Isaac Asimov
One cannot walk through an assembly factory and not feel that one is in Hell.
- W H Auden
I cried myself to sleep every one of those nights you went out. I was in hell, praying for daylight when you'd be with me and not them
- Kahlen Aymes
Ah, the Wonderful World of Camping - may it rot in hell.
- P C Cast
When we fall in love, we hope - both egotistically and altruistically - that we shall be finally, truly seen: judged and approved. Of course, love does not always bring approval: being seen may just as well lead to a thumbs-down and a season in hell.
- Julian Barnes
We're so screwed. (Cassandra)
Yeah, well, I don't let anyone screw me until they kiss me, and since there's not even a snowball's chance in hell of me kissing that bastard, we're not screwed. (Wulf)
- Sherrilyn Kenyon
Hurt her and you'll meet me in hell. I'll be the one tying your dick in a knot. You'll be the one bleeding out your eyeballs. (Hunter)
- Sherrilyn Kenyon
But I want to stay here. (Jeff)
And people in hell want ice water and if you don't go to the boat, you'll probably be able to take it to them in person in about twenty minutes. (Rafael)
- Sherrilyn Kenyon
Megeara wants to find it. (Arik)
And people in hell want ice water. The entire history of mankind is written by people wanting something they can't have. (Kat)
- Sherrilyn Kenyon
How do you know about Boy George? (Jesse)
I was in hell, Jesse. What do you think they used to torture me with? Bad pop songs. (Xypher)
- Sherrilyn Kenyon
He really would have done all that for her, you see, and done it believing he'd burn in hell forever for doing it. He hadn't done it, and wouldn't had made her his anyway, but you see why he'd have figured it did. Or maybe I saw it anyway, at the time. He was a maniac and a monster, but people don't love like that anymore. Or maybe it's only the maniacs and monsters who do. I don't know.
- Peter S Beagle
You don't have to believe in Hell. All you need is to hear someone who really does, who believes in it this minute, today, the way people believe in 1685 all you have to do is see his face, his voice when he says the word... and than you know that anyone who can imagine Hell has the power to make it real for other people.
- Peter S Beagle
Love seeketh not itself to please, nor for itself hath any care, but for another gives its ease, and builds a Heaven in Hell's despair.
- William Blake
How can you be in hell while you are in my heart?
- Orlando Bloom
Clown: Good Madonna, why mournest thou?
Olivia: Good Fool, for my brother's death.
Clown:I think his soul is in hell, Madonna.
Olivia:I know his soul is in heaven, Fool.
Clown: The more fool, Madonna, to mourn for your brother's soul being in heaven.
- William Shakespeare
Am I in earth, in heaven, or in hell?
Sleeping or waking, mad or well-advised?
Known unto these, and to myself disguised?
I'll say as they say, and persever so,
And in this mist at all adventures go.
- William Shakespeare
She is your treasure, she must have a husband;
I must dance bare-foot on her wedding day
And for your love to her lead apes in hell.
Talk not to me: I will go sit and weep
Till I can find occasion of revenge.
- William Shakespeare
Corrupt my brother, will you? I'll see you in hell first, sir.
- Libba Bray
If a hole in your wall is large enough for a rat to get his head in, rats will soon take over your home. If there is a hole in your heart large enough for the devil to get his head in, he'll waste no time moving in too. (from book number 3- coming soon in the Carolina Rain series)
- Nancy B Brewer
If there are damned souls in Hell, it is because men blind themselves.
- E A Bucchianeri
If there are junk yards in hell, love is the dog that guards the gates.
- Charles Bukowski
The truth is, Archer tells me, you stay in Hell until you forgive yourself. "You fucked up. Game over," he says, "so just relax.
- Chuck Palahniuk
If you ask me, people in hell just scream to hear their own voice and to pass time.
- Chuck Palahniuk
According to Babette, 98.3 percent of lawyers end up in Hell. That's in contrast to the 23 percent of farmers who are eternally damned. Some 45 percent of retail business owners are Hellbound, and 85 percent of computer software writers. Perhaps a trace number of politicians ascend to Heaven, but statistically speaking, 100 percent of them are cast into the fiery pit. As are essentially 100 percent of journalists and redheads.
- Chuck Palahniuk
So maybe I'll spend some years in prison, but you'll have a big head start on me in hell!
- Chuck Palahniuk
No one sleeps in Hell except as a possible defensive posture in retaliation during yet another punitive presentation of The English Patient.
- Chuck Palahniuk
If you believe Leondard, this is how Hell breaks people down -- by permitting them to act out to greater and greater extremes, becoming vicious caricatures of themselves, earning fewer and fewer rewards, until they finally realize their folly. Perhaps, I muse over the telephone, that is the one effective lesson which one learns in Hell.
- Chuck Palahniuk
Will I end up in Hell along with the Hamburger Helping Hand, Joe Camel and Wendy, the Snapple Lady?
- Augusten Burroughs
How long does it take man to realize that he cannot want what he wants? You have to live in hell to see heaven.
- William S Burroughs
And so, given the musical sensibilities Hatcher treasured in his earthly life, it is hard to exaggerate the severity of his torture at standing naked in his tiny kitchen in Hell as former FBI director J. Edgar Hoover sings a Bee Gees disco song backed by a full studio orchestra and Robin and Maurice.
- Robert Olen Butler
The monitor presently shows the Windows Blue Screen of Death, though this does not alarm him, as the BSoD is the universal screen saver in Hell.
- Robert Olen Butler
What can you say to a man who tells you he prefers obeying God rather than men, and that as a result he's certain he'll go to heaven if he cuts your throat?
- Voltaire
Shane held the jewelry at arm's length, dangling it like a dead rat. No way in hell am I caught dead or alive wearing that.
- Rachel Caine
Getting two-inch silver chain chokers around the neck of a guy, especially Shane, proved to be more of a problem.
Shane held the jewelry at arm's length, dangling it like a dead rat. "No way in hell am I caught dead or alive wearing that."
"Oh, come on, just this once," Eve said. "Protects your neck. As in your arteries and veins? That's kind of crucial, right?"
"Thanks for the thought, but it doesn't go with my shoes.
- Rachel Caine
No, there are no special places in hell. Hell is a democracy.
- Mike Carey
So, have a little fun. Soon enough you'll be dead and burning in Hell with the rest of your family.
- George Carlin
Great. I'd been dumped in Hell's waiting room.
- Karen Chance
You have told me, O God, to believe in hell. But you have forbidden me to think...of any man as damned
- Pierre Teilhard De Chardin
He supposed that even in Hell, people got an occasional sip of water, if only so they could appreciate the full horror of unrequited thirst when it set in again.
- Stephen King
The signs of the old flame, I know them well.
I pray that the earth gape deep enough to take me down
or the almighty Father blast me with one bolt to the shades,
the pale, glimmering shades in hell, the pit of night,
before I dishonor you, my conscience, break your laws.
- Virgil
I believe I am in Hell, therefore I am.
- Arthur Rimbaud
I believe that I am in hell, therefore I am there.
- Arthur Rimbaud
Before I die many will die with me and they'll deserve it. See you in Hell.
- Kurt Cobain
Whether he sleeps or wakes, whether he runs or walks, whether he uses a microscope or a telescope, or his naked eye, a man never discovers anything, never overtakes anything or leaves anything behind, but himself. Whatever he says or does he merely reports himself. If he is in love, he loves; if he is in heaven, he enjoys, if he is in hell, he suffers. It is his condition that determines his locality.
- Henry David Thoreau
TRUE! nervous very, very dreadfully nervous I had been and am; but why will you say that I am mad? The disease had sharpened my senses not destroyed not dulled them. Above all was the sense of hearing acute. I heard all things in the heaven and in the earth. I heard many things in hell. How, then, am I mad? Hearken! and observe how healthily how calmly I can tell you the whole story.
- Edgar Allan Poe
After you die, you're going to hell for being a dishonest bastard, and you'll burn for eternity."
The guy snatched his hand back. "I don't believe in Hell."
"Most people don't until they get there." Mab smiled at him. "Of course, if you stop lying and cheating, you can probably redeem yourself. If not, have them put marshmallows in your coffin. There's a bight side to everything, I always say.
- Jennifer Crusie
She gave Rachel her usual obsessively loving smile, including Phin in it, too, as her future son-in-law. Such a nice couple, her smile said. What lovely grandchildren they'll give me. And they'll live right next door.
Phin's answering smile said, Not a chance in hell, while Rachel gazed at Justice and Mercy, pretending she'd never heard of pornography or sex, or Phin, for that matter.
- Jennifer Crusie
When I answered that I did not pray, he sternly rebuked me. "You're in Hell. You'd better start".
- Andrew Davidson
Christ, I'm in Hell and they wear uniforms.
- Andrew Davidson
What in hell is a girl with hips like yours doing selling death?
- Kurt Vonnegut
I told him that if we doubted that we are demons in Hell, he should read The Mysterious Stranger, which Mark Twain wrote in 1898, long before the First World War (1914-1918). In the title story he proves to his own grim satisfaction, and to mine as well, that Satan and not God created the planet earth and "the damned human race." If you doubt that, read your morning paper. Never mind what paper. Never mind the date.
- Kurt Vonnegut
There's no crying in baseball and no love in Hell. It's just the rules.
- Lisa Desrochers
Because to live in a world in which no one is forgiven, where all are irredeemable, is the same as living in hell.
- Milan Kundera
Where does your soul go, when you die in Hell?
- Ursula K Le Guin
I call hellfire a threat," Natasha said, " and 'love thy neighbor' a value. But I believe in hell, or something close to it. I think hell is what we get right here on earth when people trade their spiritual and political values in on spiritual and political threats.
- David James Duncan
And, echoing Jerott, 'So why in hell have you come?' Philippa's gaze, bright and owlish and obstinate, held his to the end.
'To look after the baby,' she answered. And disconcertingly, after a second's blank pause, Francis Crawford flung back his damp head and laughed.
- Dorothy Dunnett
Sparhawk grinned. "If Martel finds out that he's drinking again, he'll reach down his throat and pull his heart out." "Can you actually do that to a man?" "You can if your arm's long enough, and if you know what you're looking for.
- David Eddings
The hottest place in Hell is reserved for those who remain neutral in times of great moral conflict.
- Martin Luther King Jr
Better to reign in hell than serve in heaven.
- George Orwell
I don't mind," he whispered. "If I had a soul, I'd probably wind up in hell anyway.
- Nancy Farmer
I'm bad and I'm going to hell, and I don't care. I'd rather be in hell than anywhere where you are.
- William Faulkner
And when you're young you want to fit in. Hell, I still want to fit in with certain humans, but as you get older you get a little more discriminating.
- Carrie Fisher
That's the difference between heaven and hell! In hell we starve! In heaven we feed each other!
- Jonathan Safran Foer
The pride of dying rich raises the loudest laugh in hell.
- John W Foster
Her stare fixed me. Without rancour and without regret; without triumph and without evil; as Desdemona once looked back on Venice.
On the incomprehension, the baffled rage of Venice. I had taken myself to be in some way the traitor Iago punished, in an unwritten sixth act. Chained in hell. But I was also Venice; the state left behind; the thing journeyed from.
- John Fowles
but i've slammed the door to my inner self; if he ever wants to force the lock again, he'll have to use a harder crowbar!
- Anne Frank
Better to reign in hell than serve in heaven.
- John Milton
Sweet bleedin' hell, luv, this was a smashing idea.
- Jeaniene Frost
Ten Things You Shouldn't Say on a Date.
1. You're wearing that?
2. Something smells funny.
3. Where's the Tylenol?
4. And to think, I first wanted to date your brother.
5. I have a confession to make...
6. My dad has a suit just like that.
7. That man is hot. Look at him.
8. My ex, may he rot in hell forever...
9. You're going to order that? Seriously?
10. You're how old?
- Gena Showalter
Oh, Lord!" This must be what it's like to make love in Hell," he whispered. "With a burning she-devil.
- Diana Gabaldon
You won't burn in hell. But be nice anyway.
- Ricky Gervais
Ah but' 'there'll be no butter in hell!
- Stella Gibbons
In hell there is no other punishment than to begin over and over again the tasks left unfinished in your lifetime.
- Andre Gide
The Dutch customs once thought my pictures were photos. Where on earth did they think I could have photographed my subjects? In Hell, perhaps?
- H R Giger
If you do bad stuff and don't repent, you go to hell," Orc said, like he was begging for a refutation.
"Yeah, well, you know what? If Howard's in hell, I guess we can all have a big get-together soon enough.
- Michael Grant
The human mind is so limited it can only build an arbitrary heaven and usually the physical comforts they endow it with are naively the kind that can be perceived as we humans perceive nothing more. No: perhaps I will awake to find myself burning in hell. I think not. I think I will be snuffed out. Black is sleep; black is a fainting spell; and black is death, with no light, no waking.
- Sylvia Plath
I told him I believed in hell, and that certain people, like me, had to live in hell before they died, to make up for missing out on it after death, since they didn't believe in life after death, and what each person believed happened to him when he died.
- Sylvia Plath
The people on the edge of Hell were most afraid of the devil; for those already in hell the devil was only another and no one in particular.
- Joanne Greenberg
I draw a weekly comic strip called Life in Hell, which is syndicated in about 250 newspapers. That's what I did before The Simpsons, and what I plan to do for the rest of my life.
- Matt Groening
Money doesn't spend in hell, Wilkes. The devil deals in a different coin.
- Laurell K Hamilton
I have known heaven, and now I am in hell, and there are mimes.
- Nick Harkaway
And as far as Piscary is concerned, he can burn in hellif his soul hadn't already evaporated.
- Kim Harrison
From the back came an unearthly, satisfied chuckle. All I could see in the rearview mirror was a dark shadow with red goat-slitted eyes. Fear slithered through me.
Shit, I have a demon in my backseat. What in hell am I playing with?
"Good witch," Al said, his voice coming from nothing, and I stifled a shudder. "You're starting to understand.
- Kim Harrison
Some say it is better to rule in hell than serve in heaven. That is a defeatist attitude. I intend to rule everywhere, not just in Hell.
- General Agamemnon
New Memoirs
- Brian Herbert
I won't telephone him. I'll never telephone him again as long as I live. He'll rot in hell, before I'll call him up. You don't have to give me strength, God; I have it myself. If he wanted me, he could get me. He knows where I am. He knows I'm waiting here. He's so sure of me, so sure. I wonder why they hate you, as soon as they are sure of you.
- Dorothy Parker
It would be Carol, in a thousand cities, a thousand houses, in foreign lands where they would go together, in heaven and in hell.
- Patricia Highsmith
You have no idea what you do to me," he said as he stood. "I could barely keep my hands off you last night, even after seeing what you'd been through this week. Even after knowing how wrecked you were when you told me. And I"m going to spend an eternity in hell for that dream I had about you on your birthday. But if I could call it up again, I'd spend it twice.
- Michelle Hodkin
You ask me, I'd guess heaven and hell look pretty much the same," I replied. "Only in hell, everything is just a little out of reach.
- Chris F Holm
In Hell all the messages you ever left on answering machines will be played back to you.
- Judy Horacek
Who made the world I cannot tell;
'Tis made, and here I am in hell.
- A E Housman
She felt both relaxed and protected with him, at least from outside forces. Nothing, it seemed, could protect her from him, and tonight she wasn't even certain she wanted to be. Claimed, and mated. She was his, but was he hers? And if he was, what in hell did they do about it?
"I don't even know what you want," she said fretfully, beginning to lose herself in rising sensation.
"This," he muttered in a dark, rough tone. "You.
Everything.
- Linda Howard
As to those who hoard gold and silver and spend it not in God's path, give them, then, the tidings of a painful agony: on a day when these things shall be heated in hell-fire, and their foreheads, and their sides, and their backs shall be branded therewith.
- Kin Hubbard
My old man's a white old man
And my old mother's black.
If ever I cursed my white old man
I take my curses back.
If ever I cursed my black old mother
And wished she were in hell,
I'm sorry for that evil wish
And now i wish her well
My old man died in a fine big house
My Ma died in a shack.
I wonder were i'm going to die,
Being neither white nor black?
- Langston Hughes
The question for the man of sense is: Do we or do we not want to go to hell? And his answer is: No, we don't. And if that's his answer, then he won't have anything to do with any of the politicians. Because they all want to land us in hell.
- Aldous Huxley
A belief in hell and the knowledge that every ambition is doomed to frustration at the hands of a skeleton have never prevented the majority of human beings from behaving as though death were no more than an unfounded rumor.
- Aldous Huxley
In the world it is called Tolerance, but in hell it is called Despair...the sin that believes in nothing, cares for nothing, seeks to know nothing, interferes with nothing, enjoys nothing, hates nothing, finds purpose in nothing, lives for nothing, and remains alive because there is nothing for which it will die.
- Dorothy L Sayers
We are in hell, my dear, there is never a mistake and people are not damned for nothing.
- Jean Paul Sartre
Arik didn't know how long he'd been in hell. Time was one never-ending, no-lube f&*k when you were in the dark and in agony.
- Larissa Ione
Revenge, the sweetest morsel to the mouth that ever was cooked in hell.
- Walter Scott
Asked about the fact that Apple's iTunes software for Windows computers was extremely popular, Jobs joked, 'It's like giving a glass of ice water to somebody in hell.
- Walter Isaacson
With the blood dripping from her lips, with her blood spattered white dress, and with her pale skin, she is just a horrifyingly lovely and a breathtakingly attractive sixteen-year-old girl living in Hell. Nothing wrong with that, right?
- Cameron Jace
What I don't think has been talked about is the fact that in order to be Hell, the people in Hell could never be sure they were really there.
- Denis Johnson
Once I was free in the shackles of sin:
Free to be tempted, just bound to give in;
Free to be captive to any desire;
Free to eternally burn in hell's fire.
'Til Someone bought me and called me His slave:
Bound by commands I am free to obey;
Captive by beauty I'm free to adore--
Sentenced to sit at His feet evermore.
- John F Macarthur Jr
Streets teemed with hell's wretched souls. New dead with their gadgets and old dead from antiquity. Demons roamed the avenues and alleyways, tormenting hapless damned at random with branding irons, flaming pitchforks, and razor-wire whips. -From the story Remember, Remember, Hell in November, in the anthology, Lawyers in Hell.
- Larry Atchley Jr
Cap'n is the cuddliest cat this side of the rabbit hole. He's like a furry lump of clay, because no matter what position you put him in, he'll stay there and purr and then fall asleep. I could fold him up and stuff him in a Chinese to-go box, and he'd not even meow once in protest. This works great, because instead of snuggling with leftover chicken lo mein, I now fall asleep with Cap'n curled up next to me.
- Jarod Kintz
I think we should keep politics out of church, and back in hell where it belongs.
- Jarod Kintz
If you live in the dark a long time and the sun comes out, you do not cross into it whistling. There's an initial uprush of relief at first, then-for me, anyway- a profound dislocation. My old assumptions about how the world works are buried, yet my new ones aren't yet operational.There's been a death of sorts, but without a few days in hell, no resurrection is possible.
- Mary Karr
I think the most tortured place in hell should be reserved not for traitors, but... for cowards. The weakest, most spineless losers. Because it seems to me that traitors? At least they made a choice. But cowards? They just run around biting their fingernails, totally afraid to do anything. Which is totally worse.
- Lauren Kate
I have more often as my companion "darkness." And when the night becomes very thick- and it seems to me as if I will end up in hell- then I simply offer myself to Jesus.
- Mother Teresa
I would rather my soul broil in hell than I do you any harm.
- William Kidd
many pass for saints on earth whose souls are in hell.
- Martin Luther
Now take my hand and hold it tight.
I will not fail you here tonight,
For failing you, I fail myself
And place my soul upon a shelf
In Hell's library without light.
I will not fail you here tonight.
- Dean Koontz
Ella knew she should be horrified. Zane had killed someone for just touching her. But, and she might burn in hell for thinking this, she thought it was the nicest thing anyone had ever done for her. In a perverted way, she also found it romantic. She finally had someone who wanted to protect her. My very own vampire in dark armor.
- Eve Langlais
There are only two kinds of people in the end: those who say to God, "Thy will be done," and those to whom God says, in the end, "Thy will be done." All that are in Hell, choose it. Without that self-choice there could be no Hell. No soul that seriously and constantly desires joy will ever miss it. Those who seek find. Those who knock it is opened.
- C S Lewis
There was, no doubt, a confusion of persons in damnation: what Pantheists falsely hoped of Heaven bad men really received in Hell. They were melted down into their Master, as a lead soldier slips down and loses his shape in the ladle over the gas ring.
- C S Lewis
At the end of things, The Blessed will say, "We have never lived anywhere except in Heaven." And the lost will say, "We were always in Hell." And both will speak truly.
- C S Lewis
But of course, very few people are Dexter. This is generally a good thing, but in this case it came in handy to be me. Four months after reading a story in the paper about a missing boy, I read a similar story. The boys were around the same age; details like that always ring a small bell and send a Mister Rogers whisper trickling through my brain: Hello, neighbor.
- Jeff Lindsay
Don't make me have to chase after you again, because there's no way in hell you can get away from me, lady.
-Chandos-
- Johanna Lindsey
You better think real carefully before you say anything, cateyes, because if
you give me your love, I'm not going to let you take it back. I can't keep worrying about whether or not
I can make you happy. I'll try my best but there isn't going to be any changing your mind later. Do you
understand what I'm saying? If you're going to be my woman, there's no way in hell I'll ever let you go.
- Johanna Lindsey
All the devils in hell and tempters on earth could do us no injury if there were no corruption in our own natures.
- Charles Spurgeon
Do you think there's such a thing as a ghost who masquerades as a person? Do you believe that there are people whose bodies are still alive here on earth but whose souls are already in hell?
- Ann Marie Macdonald
I don't know how I stay alive. What I do know is that there is a light, far above us, that goes out when we die,
and that in Hell there is a gray tulip that grows without any sun. It reminds me of everything I failed at,
and I water it carefully. It is all I have to remind me of you.
- Sarah Manguso
He said that even the damned in hell have the community of their suffering and he thought that he'd guessed out likewise for the living a nominal grief like a grange from which disaster and ruin are proportioned by laws of equity too subtle for divining.
- Cormac Mccarthy
How can you believe in heaven if you don't believe in hell?
- Cormac Mccarthy
Your old man called me. He wanted you to call home.
People in hell want ice water.
- Cormac Mccarthy
Continuous persecution of widows and orphans is a crime. Even the Bible says there is a specific place in hell for those who oppress widows.
- Imelda Marcos
Of course, if I eat all of him, if I spare his brain, he'll rise up and follow me back to the airport, and that might make feel better. I'll introduce him to everyone, and maybe we'll stand around and groan for a while. It's hard to say what 'friends' are any more, but that might be close.
- Isaac Marion
Eating is not a pleasant business. I chew off a man's arm, and I hate it.
Of course if I don't eat all of him, if I spare his brain, he'll rise up and follow me back to the airport, and that might make me feel better. I'll introduce him to everyone, and maybe we'll stand around and groan for a while.
- Isaac Marion
I am Wrath. I had neither father nor mother: I leaped out of a lion's mouth when I was scarce half an hour old, and ever since I have run up and down the world, with this case of rapiers, wounding myself when I had nobody to fight withal. I was born in hell - and look to it, for some of you shall be my father.
- Christopher Marlowe
All beasts are happy,
For, when they die,
Their souls are soon dissolv'd in elements;
But mine must live still to be plagu'd in hell.
Curs'd be the parents that engender'd me!
No, Faustus, curse thyself, curse Lucifer
That hath depriv'd thee of the joys of heaven.
- Christopher Marlowe
Fools that will laugh on earth, most weep in hell.
- Christopher Marlowe
Isn't it ironic, Richard Parker? We're in hell yet still we're afraid of immortality
- Yann Martel
Any body of men who believe in hell will persecute whenever they have the power.
- Joseph Mccabe
In theory, you're supposed to get
everyone's names and become lifelong friends. I literally had contact with half the kids
here last night, but how in hell do they expect me to differentiate one of my butt-to-butt
dancing partners from another? Am I supposed to randomly rub my buttocks up against
people to see if we've bonded booties before? "Yes, the particular musculature of your
ass does feel familiar. 1 remember you now!" Duh.
- Megan Mccafferty
If I owned Marseilles and Hell, I'd rent out Marseilles and live in Hell.
- John Mccarthy
It was hysterical going to work. I would just walk in and think, 'What in hell? Am I here? What's going on? I'm going to wake up in a minute. I'm in a dream.'
- Jacqueline Mckenzie
I offered them Utopia, but they fought for the right to live in Hell.
- Mark Millar
Be to her, Persephone,
All the things I might not be;
Take her head upon your knee.
She that was so proud and wild,
Flippant, arrogant and free,
She that had no need of me,
Is a little lonely child
Lost in Hell,Persephone,
Take her head upon your knee;
Say to her, My dear, my dear,
It is not so dreadful here.
- Edna St Vincent Millay
Lost in Hell,-Persephone,
Take her head upon your knee;
Say to her, My dear, my dear,
It is not so dreadful here.
- Edna St Vincent Millay
It's all my fault! Everything is my fault and no one knows it more than me. We're all in hell and I'm the one that put us here.
- Katja Millay
Spartans... tonight we dine in Hell!
- Frank Miller
I can see you are a fine lady, but this boy is randy as a goat around you and it's plain to see. If he seeks the joys of wedded bliss, he can wed you. Without a weddin' he'll be havin' no bliss.
- Karen Marie Moning
I figure the folks that are the most interesting get to go to heaven. I mean, if I was God, that's who I'd want there with me... I'd rather be a superhero in hell than an angel in heaven. What the feck would I do all day if I wasn't kicking demon ass?
- Karen Marie Moning
The entire time I'm burning in Hell, I'll regret each tear I made you weep. But if Hell were the price for twenty days with you, I'd condemn myself again and again.
- Cian MacKeltar
- Karen Marie Moning
Good night, Lisa. Sleep with the angels."
Her eyes stung from quick tears. It had been her mother's nightly benediction: Sleep with the angels. But then he added words her mother never had: "Then come back to earth and sleep with your devil, who would burn in hell for one night in your arms.
- Karen Marie Moning
I shall tell you where we are. We're in the most extreme and utter region of the human mind. A dim, subconscious underworld. A radiant abyss where men meet themselves. Hell, Netley. We're in Hell.
- Alan Moore
Reverend Father is the only kind man I ever see. When I arrive here I believe it is the place he warns against. The freezing in hell that comes before the everlasting fire where sinners bubble and singe forever. But the ice comes first, he says. And when I see knives of it hanging from the houses and trees and feel the white air burn my face I am certain the fire is coming.
- Toni Morrison
The freezing in hell that comes before the everlasting fire where sinners bubble and singe forever.
- Toni Morrison
I used to think that teachers who gave homework on weekends should be forced to grade papers for an eternity in hell.
- Mike Mullin
In my childhood I always felt that I was treated unjustly, without a mother, sick, and with the threat of punishment in Hell hanging over my head.
- Edvard Munch
I have no fear of photography as long as it cannot be used in heaven and in hell.
- Edvard Munch
I learned early about the misery and dangers of life, and about the afterlife, about the external punishment which awaited the children of sin in Hell.
- Edvard Munch
Yes. We will live the rest of our lives in hell. It's not so bad: as long as you're prepared for it, you can live anywhere.
- Mizuki Nomura
When sorrow comes, they come not single spies, but in battalions. I've allies in heaven, Jack, i've commrades in hell...say hello for me..
- James O Barr
[Writing about her address to a ladies club]: The heart of my message to them was that they would all fry in Hell if they didn't quit reading trash.
- Flannery O Connor
I hate doctors! They'll do anything... to keep you coming to them. They'll sell their souls. What's worse, they'll sell yours, and you never know it till one day you find yourself in hell.
- Eugene O Neill
To see the madness and yet walk a perfect silver line.... That's what the true story-teller should be: a great guide, a clear mind, who can walk a silver line in hell or madness.
- Ben Okri
They seek him here, they seek him there
Those Frenchies seek him everywhere
Is he in heaven or is he in hell?
That demned elusive Pimpernel
- Emmuska Orczy
We seek him here, we seek him there, Those Frenchies seek him everywhere. Is he in heaven? - Is he in hell? That damned, elusive Pimpernel?
- Baroness Orczy
There'll be a special place in hell for the tape back-up people.
- Adam Osborne
Marines are very good at fighting... And if Gen. Franks wants fighters on the ground and he puts Marines in, he'll have what he wants.
- Peter Pace
Some poems are written great, some poems are written swell. But then there are poems that could win a prize in Hell.
- Stanley Victor Paskavich
If there's a place for me in Hell I hope it's next to someone like you
- Stanley Victor Paskavich
In time of war, the Devil makes more room in Hell.
- Sharon Kay Penman
I think the damned souls in hell must spend half their time wondering what it was that they really meant to do.
- Elizabeth Marie Pope
Tom Chaney would pay for this! I would not rest easy until that Louisiana cur was roasting and screaming in hell!
- Charles Portis
She'd grown up believing in hell in an abstract nightmare way; but west Texas had given her something more concrete upon which to dread the afterlife.
- Cherie Priest
The cool thing about being best friends is that you can make big plans even if there's only a slim chance in hell that they'll ever happen.
- Yvonne Prinz
What in hell are you really made of, Howard? After all, it's only a building. It's not the combination of holy sacrament, Indian torture, and sexual ecstasy that you seem to make of it."
"Isn't it?
- Ayn Rand
It's so much easier to pass judgment on a man than on an idea. Though how in hell one passes judgment on a man without considering the content of his brain is more than I'll ever understand.
- Ayn Rand
She wasn't there. He wouldn't have had to look too closely. She stood out from others like an angel in hell or a rose in a sewer.
- Ruth Rendell
If it were your soul I was after, all the dark Cherubim in Hell couldn't keep me from you... I would have done whatever it took to save you... Even if that meant I had to spend eternity in Hell.
- Sylvain Reynard
I would have done whatever it took to save you.' His voice and his expression were grave. 'Even if that meant I had to spend eternity in Hell.
- Sylvain Reynard
I'm going to be thrown out of Paradise tomorrow, Beatrice. Our only hope is that you find me afterward. Look for me in Hell.
- Sylvain Reynard
I didn't want to be in hell, even for a moment. I sure as hell wasn't going there just to spit in the face of the Prince of Darkness, whoever he might be!
On the contrary, if I was a damned thing, then let the son of a bitch come for me! Let him tell me why I was mean to suffer. I would truly like to know.
As for oblivion, well, we can wait a little while for that.
- Anne Rice
Do devils love each other? Do they walk arm in arm in hell saying, "Ah, you are my friend, how I love you," things like that to each other?...it was a matter of a concept of evil, wasn't it? All creatures in hell are supposed to hate one another, as all the saved hate the damned, without reservation.
- Anne Rice
Hotter than a fuck in hell.
- J D Robb
I was raised thinking I'd burn in hell for being gay, but I didn't have a choice. It's just who I am.
- Jai Rodriguez
Random line from BURNING DARKNESS: Fonda Raine stepped out of the back end of a month in hell a hardened warrior, ready to undertake the most important task of her life: kill Eric Aruda.
- Jaime Rush
- Mark Twain
He said that everything in this world, small or large, was created for a reason. Even the smallest mosquito that bites people and makes them itch. There is wisdom behind that itch, in that it can be a substitute for a corresponding irritation in Hell. He said that every trouble we land in comes from a sin which would not be forgiven without that trouble.
- Leila Aboulela
If marriages are said to be made in heaven then why search for grooms in hell.
- Amit Abraham
God will roast their stomachs in hell at the hands of Iraqis.
- Mohammed Saeed Al Sahaf
But how to explain suffering because of a man? It's not explainable. With that kind of suffering, a person feels as if they're in hell, because there is no nobility, no greatness - only misery.
- Paulo Coelho
It is easy to suffer for a cause or for a mission; this ennobles the heart of the person suffering. But how to explain suffering because of a man? It's not explainable. With that kind of suffering, a person feels as if they're in hell, because there is no nobility, no greatness - only misery.
- Paulo Coelho
she didn't need anyone. At Wheeler, even when she stood out with her pink hair and quilter army-surplus jacket and combat bots, she did this without apology. It was a great irony that the very fact of a relationship with her would diminish her appeal, that the moment she came to love me back and depend on me as much as I depended on her, she would no longer be a truly independent spirit. No way in hell was I going to be the one to take that quality away from her.
- Jodi Picoult
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women.
(Keynote speech at Celebrating Inspiration luncheon with the WNBA's All-Decade Team, 2006)
- Madeleine Albright
I also think it is important for women to help one another. I have a saying: There is a special place in hell for women who don't.
- Madeleine Albright
There's people in hell who want ice water.
- Nelson Algren
I know I got it made while the masses of black people are catchin' hell, but as long as they ain't free, I ain't free.
- Muhammad Ali
The hottest places in hell are reserved for those who, in time of great moral crisis,
maintain their neutrality.
- Dante Alighieri,philosopher/poet
- Dante Alighieri
The path to paradise begins in hell.
- Dante Alighieri
The darkest places in hell are reserved for those who maintain their neutrality in times of moral crisis.
- Dante Alighieri
They're still looking at him.... At Will..."
"Of course they are.... Look at him. The face of a bad angel and eyes like the night sky in Hell.
- Cassandra Clare
Look at him. The face of a bad angel and eyes like the night sky in Hell. He's very pretty, and vampires like that. I can't say I mind either.
- Cassandra Clare
Please do it your own way.
Do it in the mornings when your mind is cold
Do it in the evenings when everything is sold.
Do it in the springtime when springtime isn't there
Do it in the winter
We know winter well
Do it on very hot days
Try doing it in hell.
Trade bed for a pencil
Trade sorrow for a page
No work it out your own way
Have good luck at your age.
- Ernest Hemingway
I don't allow people of your sort to stand in my way. That's what you're leaving out of account. I'm having Christine because it's my right. Do you understand that? If I'm after something, I don't care what I do to make sure that I get it. That's the only law I abide by; it's the only was to get things in this world...With me you just haven't a hope in hell.
- Kingsley Amis
I wish I had cancer. I will burn in hell for that, but it's true.
- Laurie Halse Anderson
If somebody ever wished to be me for a day, they'd be the most pissed-off person once they got here. They would be, like, in hell.
- Jennifer Aniston
That the saints may enjoy their beatitude and the grace of God more abundantly they are permitted to see the punishment of the damned in hell.
- Thomas Aquinas
You in my life, me livin' in hell, feels like I've been touched by an angel.
- Kristen Ashley
There is nothing frightening about an eternal dreamless sleep. Surely it is better than eternal torment in Hell and eternal boredom in Heaven.
- Isaac Asimov
One cannot walk through an assembly factory and not feel that one is in Hell.
- W H Auden
I cried myself to sleep every one of those nights you went out. I was in hell, praying for daylight when you'd be with me and not them
- Kahlen Aymes
Ah, the Wonderful World of Camping - may it rot in hell.
- P C Cast
When we fall in love, we hope - both egotistically and altruistically - that we shall be finally, truly seen: judged and approved. Of course, love does not always bring approval: being seen may just as well lead to a thumbs-down and a season in hell.
- Julian Barnes
We're so screwed. (Cassandra)
Yeah, well, I don't let anyone screw me until they kiss me, and since there's not even a snowball's chance in hell of me kissing that bastard, we're not screwed. (Wulf)
- Sherrilyn Kenyon
Hurt her and you'll meet me in hell. I'll be the one tying your dick in a knot. You'll be the one bleeding out your eyeballs. (Hunter)
- Sherrilyn Kenyon
But I want to stay here. (Jeff)
And people in hell want ice water and if you don't go to the boat, you'll probably be able to take it to them in person in about twenty minutes. (Rafael)
- Sherrilyn Kenyon
Megeara wants to find it. (Arik)
And people in hell want ice water. The entire history of mankind is written by people wanting something they can't have. (Kat)
- Sherrilyn Kenyon
How do you know about Boy George? (Jesse)
I was in hell, Jesse. What do you think they used to torture me with? Bad pop songs. (Xypher)
- Sherrilyn Kenyon
He really would have done all that for her, you see, and done it believing he'd burn in hell forever for doing it. He hadn't done it, and wouldn't had made her his anyway, but you see why he'd have figured it did. Or maybe I saw it anyway, at the time. He was a maniac and a monster, but people don't love like that anymore. Or maybe it's only the maniacs and monsters who do. I don't know.
- Peter S Beagle
You don't have to believe in Hell. All you need is to hear someone who really does, who believes in it this minute, today, the way people believe in 1685 all you have to do is see his face, his voice when he says the word... and than you know that anyone who can imagine Hell has the power to make it real for other people.
- Peter S Beagle
Love seeketh not itself to please, nor for itself hath any care, but for another gives its ease, and builds a Heaven in Hell's despair.
- William Blake
How can you be in hell while you are in my heart?
- Orlando Bloom
Clown: Good Madonna, why mournest thou?
Olivia: Good Fool, for my brother's death.
Clown:I think his soul is in hell, Madonna.
Olivia:I know his soul is in heaven, Fool.
Clown: The more fool, Madonna, to mourn for your brother's soul being in heaven.
- William Shakespeare
Am I in earth, in heaven, or in hell?
Sleeping or waking, mad or well-advised?
Known unto these, and to myself disguised?
I'll say as they say, and persever so,
And in this mist at all adventures go.
- William Shakespeare
She is your treasure, she must have a husband;
I must dance bare-foot on her wedding day
And for your love to her lead apes in hell.
Talk not to me: I will go sit and weep
Till I can find occasion of revenge.
- William Shakespeare
Corrupt my brother, will you? I'll see you in hell first, sir.
- Libba Bray
If a hole in your wall is large enough for a rat to get his head in, rats will soon take over your home. If there is a hole in your heart large enough for the devil to get his head in, he'll waste no time moving in too. (from book number 3- coming soon in the Carolina Rain series)
- Nancy B Brewer
If there are damned souls in Hell, it is because men blind themselves.
- E A Bucchianeri
If there are junk yards in hell, love is the dog that guards the gates.
- Charles Bukowski
The truth is, Archer tells me, you stay in Hell until you forgive yourself. "You fucked up. Game over," he says, "so just relax.
- Chuck Palahniuk
If you ask me, people in hell just scream to hear their own voice and to pass time.
- Chuck Palahniuk
According to Babette, 98.3 percent of lawyers end up in Hell. That's in contrast to the 23 percent of farmers who are eternally damned. Some 45 percent of retail business owners are Hellbound, and 85 percent of computer software writers. Perhaps a trace number of politicians ascend to Heaven, but statistically speaking, 100 percent of them are cast into the fiery pit. As are essentially 100 percent of journalists and redheads.
- Chuck Palahniuk
So maybe I'll spend some years in prison, but you'll have a big head start on me in hell!
- Chuck Palahniuk
No one sleeps in Hell except as a possible defensive posture in retaliation during yet another punitive presentation of The English Patient.
- Chuck Palahniuk
If you believe Leondard, this is how Hell breaks people down -- by permitting them to act out to greater and greater extremes, becoming vicious caricatures of themselves, earning fewer and fewer rewards, until they finally realize their folly. Perhaps, I muse over the telephone, that is the one effective lesson which one learns in Hell.
- Chuck Palahniuk
Will I end up in Hell along with the Hamburger Helping Hand, Joe Camel and Wendy, the Snapple Lady?
- Augusten Burroughs
How long does it take man to realize that he cannot want what he wants? You have to live in hell to see heaven.
- William S Burroughs
And so, given the musical sensibilities Hatcher treasured in his earthly life, it is hard to exaggerate the severity of his torture at standing naked in his tiny kitchen in Hell as former FBI director J. Edgar Hoover sings a Bee Gees disco song backed by a full studio orchestra and Robin and Maurice.
- Robert Olen Butler
The monitor presently shows the Windows Blue Screen of Death, though this does not alarm him, as the BSoD is the universal screen saver in Hell.
- Robert Olen Butler
What can you say to a man who tells you he prefers obeying God rather than men, and that as a result he's certain he'll go to heaven if he cuts your throat?
- Voltaire
Shane held the jewelry at arm's length, dangling it like a dead rat. No way in hell am I caught dead or alive wearing that.
- Rachel Caine
Getting two-inch silver chain chokers around the neck of a guy, especially Shane, proved to be more of a problem.
Shane held the jewelry at arm's length, dangling it like a dead rat. "No way in hell am I caught dead or alive wearing that."
"Oh, come on, just this once," Eve said. "Protects your neck. As in your arteries and veins? That's kind of crucial, right?"
"Thanks for the thought, but it doesn't go with my shoes.
- Rachel Caine
No, there are no special places in hell. Hell is a democracy.
- Mike Carey
So, have a little fun. Soon enough you'll be dead and burning in Hell with the rest of your family.
- George Carlin
Great. I'd been dumped in Hell's waiting room.
- Karen Chance
You have told me, O God, to believe in hell. But you have forbidden me to think...of any man as damned
- Pierre Teilhard De Chardin
He supposed that even in Hell, people got an occasional sip of water, if only so they could appreciate the full horror of unrequited thirst when it set in again.
- Stephen King
The signs of the old flame, I know them well.
I pray that the earth gape deep enough to take me down
or the almighty Father blast me with one bolt to the shades,
the pale, glimmering shades in hell, the pit of night,
before I dishonor you, my conscience, break your laws.
- Virgil
I believe I am in Hell, therefore I am.
- Arthur Rimbaud
I believe that I am in hell, therefore I am there.
- Arthur Rimbaud
Before I die many will die with me and they'll deserve it. See you in Hell.
- Kurt Cobain
Whether he sleeps or wakes, whether he runs or walks, whether he uses a microscope or a telescope, or his naked eye, a man never discovers anything, never overtakes anything or leaves anything behind, but himself. Whatever he says or does he merely reports himself. If he is in love, he loves; if he is in heaven, he enjoys, if he is in hell, he suffers. It is his condition that determines his locality.
- Henry David Thoreau
TRUE! nervous very, very dreadfully nervous I had been and am; but why will you say that I am mad? The disease had sharpened my senses not destroyed not dulled them. Above all was the sense of hearing acute. I heard all things in the heaven and in the earth. I heard many things in hell. How, then, am I mad? Hearken! and observe how healthily how calmly I can tell you the whole story.
- Edgar Allan Poe
After you die, you're going to hell for being a dishonest bastard, and you'll burn for eternity."
The guy snatched his hand back. "I don't believe in Hell."
"Most people don't until they get there." Mab smiled at him. "Of course, if you stop lying and cheating, you can probably redeem yourself. If not, have them put marshmallows in your coffin. There's a bight side to everything, I always say.
- Jennifer Crusie
She gave Rachel her usual obsessively loving smile, including Phin in it, too, as her future son-in-law. Such a nice couple, her smile said. What lovely grandchildren they'll give me. And they'll live right next door.
Phin's answering smile said, Not a chance in hell, while Rachel gazed at Justice and Mercy, pretending she'd never heard of pornography or sex, or Phin, for that matter.
- Jennifer Crusie
When I answered that I did not pray, he sternly rebuked me. "You're in Hell. You'd better start".
- Andrew Davidson
Christ, I'm in Hell and they wear uniforms.
- Andrew Davidson
What in hell is a girl with hips like yours doing selling death?
- Kurt Vonnegut
I told him that if we doubted that we are demons in Hell, he should read The Mysterious Stranger, which Mark Twain wrote in 1898, long before the First World War (1914-1918). In the title story he proves to his own grim satisfaction, and to mine as well, that Satan and not God created the planet earth and "the damned human race." If you doubt that, read your morning paper. Never mind what paper. Never mind the date.
- Kurt Vonnegut
There's no crying in baseball and no love in Hell. It's just the rules.
- Lisa Desrochers
Because to live in a world in which no one is forgiven, where all are irredeemable, is the same as living in hell.
- Milan Kundera
Where does your soul go, when you die in Hell?
- Ursula K Le Guin
I call hellfire a threat," Natasha said, " and 'love thy neighbor' a value. But I believe in hell, or something close to it. I think hell is what we get right here on earth when people trade their spiritual and political values in on spiritual and political threats.
- David James Duncan
And, echoing Jerott, 'So why in hell have you come?' Philippa's gaze, bright and owlish and obstinate, held his to the end.
'To look after the baby,' she answered. And disconcertingly, after a second's blank pause, Francis Crawford flung back his damp head and laughed.
- Dorothy Dunnett
Sparhawk grinned. "If Martel finds out that he's drinking again, he'll reach down his throat and pull his heart out." "Can you actually do that to a man?" "You can if your arm's long enough, and if you know what you're looking for.
- David Eddings
The hottest place in Hell is reserved for those who remain neutral in times of great moral conflict.
- Martin Luther King Jr
Better to reign in hell than serve in heaven.
- George Orwell
I don't mind," he whispered. "If I had a soul, I'd probably wind up in hell anyway.
- Nancy Farmer
I'm bad and I'm going to hell, and I don't care. I'd rather be in hell than anywhere where you are.
- William Faulkner
And when you're young you want to fit in. Hell, I still want to fit in with certain humans, but as you get older you get a little more discriminating.
- Carrie Fisher
That's the difference between heaven and hell! In hell we starve! In heaven we feed each other!
- Jonathan Safran Foer
The pride of dying rich raises the loudest laugh in hell.
- John W Foster
Her stare fixed me. Without rancour and without regret; without triumph and without evil; as Desdemona once looked back on Venice.
On the incomprehension, the baffled rage of Venice. I had taken myself to be in some way the traitor Iago punished, in an unwritten sixth act. Chained in hell. But I was also Venice; the state left behind; the thing journeyed from.
- John Fowles
but i've slammed the door to my inner self; if he ever wants to force the lock again, he'll have to use a harder crowbar!
- Anne Frank
Better to reign in hell than serve in heaven.
- John Milton
Sweet bleedin' hell, luv, this was a smashing idea.
- Jeaniene Frost
Ten Things You Shouldn't Say on a Date.
1. You're wearing that?
2. Something smells funny.
3. Where's the Tylenol?
4. And to think, I first wanted to date your brother.
5. I have a confession to make...
6. My dad has a suit just like that.
7. That man is hot. Look at him.
8. My ex, may he rot in hell forever...
9. You're going to order that? Seriously?
10. You're how old?
- Gena Showalter
Oh, Lord!" This must be what it's like to make love in Hell," he whispered. "With a burning she-devil.
- Diana Gabaldon
You won't burn in hell. But be nice anyway.
- Ricky Gervais
Ah but' 'there'll be no butter in hell!
- Stella Gibbons
In hell there is no other punishment than to begin over and over again the tasks left unfinished in your lifetime.
- Andre Gide
The Dutch customs once thought my pictures were photos. Where on earth did they think I could have photographed my subjects? In Hell, perhaps?
- H R Giger
If you do bad stuff and don't repent, you go to hell," Orc said, like he was begging for a refutation.
"Yeah, well, you know what? If Howard's in hell, I guess we can all have a big get-together soon enough.
- Michael Grant
The human mind is so limited it can only build an arbitrary heaven and usually the physical comforts they endow it with are naively the kind that can be perceived as we humans perceive nothing more. No: perhaps I will awake to find myself burning in hell. I think not. I think I will be snuffed out. Black is sleep; black is a fainting spell; and black is death, with no light, no waking.
- Sylvia Plath
I told him I believed in hell, and that certain people, like me, had to live in hell before they died, to make up for missing out on it after death, since they didn't believe in life after death, and what each person believed happened to him when he died.
- Sylvia Plath
The people on the edge of Hell were most afraid of the devil; for those already in hell the devil was only another and no one in particular.
- Joanne Greenberg
I draw a weekly comic strip called Life in Hell, which is syndicated in about 250 newspapers. That's what I did before The Simpsons, and what I plan to do for the rest of my life.
- Matt Groening
Money doesn't spend in hell, Wilkes. The devil deals in a different coin.
- Laurell K Hamilton
I have known heaven, and now I am in hell, and there are mimes.
- Nick Harkaway
And as far as Piscary is concerned, he can burn in hellif his soul hadn't already evaporated.
- Kim Harrison
From the back came an unearthly, satisfied chuckle. All I could see in the rearview mirror was a dark shadow with red goat-slitted eyes. Fear slithered through me.
Shit, I have a demon in my backseat. What in hell am I playing with?
"Good witch," Al said, his voice coming from nothing, and I stifled a shudder. "You're starting to understand.
- Kim Harrison
Some say it is better to rule in hell than serve in heaven. That is a defeatist attitude. I intend to rule everywhere, not just in Hell.
- General Agamemnon
New Memoirs
- Brian Herbert
I won't telephone him. I'll never telephone him again as long as I live. He'll rot in hell, before I'll call him up. You don't have to give me strength, God; I have it myself. If he wanted me, he could get me. He knows where I am. He knows I'm waiting here. He's so sure of me, so sure. I wonder why they hate you, as soon as they are sure of you.
- Dorothy Parker
It would be Carol, in a thousand cities, a thousand houses, in foreign lands where they would go together, in heaven and in hell.
- Patricia Highsmith
You have no idea what you do to me," he said as he stood. "I could barely keep my hands off you last night, even after seeing what you'd been through this week. Even after knowing how wrecked you were when you told me. And I"m going to spend an eternity in hell for that dream I had about you on your birthday. But if I could call it up again, I'd spend it twice.
- Michelle Hodkin
You ask me, I'd guess heaven and hell look pretty much the same," I replied. "Only in hell, everything is just a little out of reach.
- Chris F Holm
In Hell all the messages you ever left on answering machines will be played back to you.
- Judy Horacek
Who made the world I cannot tell;
'Tis made, and here I am in hell.
- A E Housman
She felt both relaxed and protected with him, at least from outside forces. Nothing, it seemed, could protect her from him, and tonight she wasn't even certain she wanted to be. Claimed, and mated. She was his, but was he hers? And if he was, what in hell did they do about it?
"I don't even know what you want," she said fretfully, beginning to lose herself in rising sensation.
"This," he muttered in a dark, rough tone. "You.
Everything.
- Linda Howard
As to those who hoard gold and silver and spend it not in God's path, give them, then, the tidings of a painful agony: on a day when these things shall be heated in hell-fire, and their foreheads, and their sides, and their backs shall be branded therewith.
- Kin Hubbard
My old man's a white old man
And my old mother's black.
If ever I cursed my white old man
I take my curses back.
If ever I cursed my black old mother
And wished she were in hell,
I'm sorry for that evil wish
And now i wish her well
My old man died in a fine big house
My Ma died in a shack.
I wonder were i'm going to die,
Being neither white nor black?
- Langston Hughes
The question for the man of sense is: Do we or do we not want to go to hell? And his answer is: No, we don't. And if that's his answer, then he won't have anything to do with any of the politicians. Because they all want to land us in hell.
- Aldous Huxley
A belief in hell and the knowledge that every ambition is doomed to frustration at the hands of a skeleton have never prevented the majority of human beings from behaving as though death were no more than an unfounded rumor.
- Aldous Huxley
In the world it is called Tolerance, but in hell it is called Despair...the sin that believes in nothing, cares for nothing, seeks to know nothing, interferes with nothing, enjoys nothing, hates nothing, finds purpose in nothing, lives for nothing, and remains alive because there is nothing for which it will die.
- Dorothy L Sayers
We are in hell, my dear, there is never a mistake and people are not damned for nothing.
- Jean Paul Sartre
Arik didn't know how long he'd been in hell. Time was one never-ending, no-lube f&*k when you were in the dark and in agony.
- Larissa Ione
Revenge, the sweetest morsel to the mouth that ever was cooked in hell.
- Walter Scott
Asked about the fact that Apple's iTunes software for Windows computers was extremely popular, Jobs joked, 'It's like giving a glass of ice water to somebody in hell.
- Walter Isaacson
With the blood dripping from her lips, with her blood spattered white dress, and with her pale skin, she is just a horrifyingly lovely and a breathtakingly attractive sixteen-year-old girl living in Hell. Nothing wrong with that, right?
- Cameron Jace
What I don't think has been talked about is the fact that in order to be Hell, the people in Hell could never be sure they were really there.
- Denis Johnson
Once I was free in the shackles of sin:
Free to be tempted, just bound to give in;
Free to be captive to any desire;
Free to eternally burn in hell's fire.
'Til Someone bought me and called me His slave:
Bound by commands I am free to obey;
Captive by beauty I'm free to adore--
Sentenced to sit at His feet evermore.
- John F Macarthur Jr
Streets teemed with hell's wretched souls. New dead with their gadgets and old dead from antiquity. Demons roamed the avenues and alleyways, tormenting hapless damned at random with branding irons, flaming pitchforks, and razor-wire whips. -From the story Remember, Remember, Hell in November, in the anthology, Lawyers in Hell.
- Larry Atchley Jr
Cap'n is the cuddliest cat this side of the rabbit hole. He's like a furry lump of clay, because no matter what position you put him in, he'll stay there and purr and then fall asleep. I could fold him up and stuff him in a Chinese to-go box, and he'd not even meow once in protest. This works great, because instead of snuggling with leftover chicken lo mein, I now fall asleep with Cap'n curled up next to me.
- Jarod Kintz
I think we should keep politics out of church, and back in hell where it belongs.
- Jarod Kintz
If you live in the dark a long time and the sun comes out, you do not cross into it whistling. There's an initial uprush of relief at first, then-for me, anyway- a profound dislocation. My old assumptions about how the world works are buried, yet my new ones aren't yet operational.There's been a death of sorts, but without a few days in hell, no resurrection is possible.
- Mary Karr
I think the most tortured place in hell should be reserved not for traitors, but... for cowards. The weakest, most spineless losers. Because it seems to me that traitors? At least they made a choice. But cowards? They just run around biting their fingernails, totally afraid to do anything. Which is totally worse.
- Lauren Kate
I have more often as my companion "darkness." And when the night becomes very thick- and it seems to me as if I will end up in hell- then I simply offer myself to Jesus.
- Mother Teresa
I would rather my soul broil in hell than I do you any harm.
- William Kidd
many pass for saints on earth whose souls are in hell.
- Martin Luther
Now take my hand and hold it tight.
I will not fail you here tonight,
For failing you, I fail myself
And place my soul upon a shelf
In Hell's library without light.
I will not fail you here tonight.
- Dean Koontz
Ella knew she should be horrified. Zane had killed someone for just touching her. But, and she might burn in hell for thinking this, she thought it was the nicest thing anyone had ever done for her. In a perverted way, she also found it romantic. She finally had someone who wanted to protect her. My very own vampire in dark armor.
- Eve Langlais
There are only two kinds of people in the end: those who say to God, "Thy will be done," and those to whom God says, in the end, "Thy will be done." All that are in Hell, choose it. Without that self-choice there could be no Hell. No soul that seriously and constantly desires joy will ever miss it. Those who seek find. Those who knock it is opened.
- C S Lewis
There was, no doubt, a confusion of persons in damnation: what Pantheists falsely hoped of Heaven bad men really received in Hell. They were melted down into their Master, as a lead soldier slips down and loses his shape in the ladle over the gas ring.
- C S Lewis
At the end of things, The Blessed will say, "We have never lived anywhere except in Heaven." And the lost will say, "We were always in Hell." And both will speak truly.
- C S Lewis
But of course, very few people are Dexter. This is generally a good thing, but in this case it came in handy to be me. Four months after reading a story in the paper about a missing boy, I read a similar story. The boys were around the same age; details like that always ring a small bell and send a Mister Rogers whisper trickling through my brain: Hello, neighbor.
- Jeff Lindsay
Don't make me have to chase after you again, because there's no way in hell you can get away from me, lady.
-Chandos-
- Johanna Lindsey
You better think real carefully before you say anything, cateyes, because if
you give me your love, I'm not going to let you take it back. I can't keep worrying about whether or not
I can make you happy. I'll try my best but there isn't going to be any changing your mind later. Do you
understand what I'm saying? If you're going to be my woman, there's no way in hell I'll ever let you go.
- Johanna Lindsey
All the devils in hell and tempters on earth could do us no injury if there were no corruption in our own natures.
- Charles Spurgeon
Do you think there's such a thing as a ghost who masquerades as a person? Do you believe that there are people whose bodies are still alive here on earth but whose souls are already in hell?
- Ann Marie Macdonald
I don't know how I stay alive. What I do know is that there is a light, far above us, that goes out when we die,
and that in Hell there is a gray tulip that grows without any sun. It reminds me of everything I failed at,
and I water it carefully. It is all I have to remind me of you.
- Sarah Manguso
He said that even the damned in hell have the community of their suffering and he thought that he'd guessed out likewise for the living a nominal grief like a grange from which disaster and ruin are proportioned by laws of equity too subtle for divining.
- Cormac Mccarthy
How can you believe in heaven if you don't believe in hell?
- Cormac Mccarthy
Your old man called me. He wanted you to call home.
People in hell want ice water.
- Cormac Mccarthy
Continuous persecution of widows and orphans is a crime. Even the Bible says there is a specific place in hell for those who oppress widows.
- Imelda Marcos
Of course, if I eat all of him, if I spare his brain, he'll rise up and follow me back to the airport, and that might make feel better. I'll introduce him to everyone, and maybe we'll stand around and groan for a while. It's hard to say what 'friends' are any more, but that might be close.
- Isaac Marion
Eating is not a pleasant business. I chew off a man's arm, and I hate it.
Of course if I don't eat all of him, if I spare his brain, he'll rise up and follow me back to the airport, and that might make me feel better. I'll introduce him to everyone, and maybe we'll stand around and groan for a while.
- Isaac Marion
I am Wrath. I had neither father nor mother: I leaped out of a lion's mouth when I was scarce half an hour old, and ever since I have run up and down the world, with this case of rapiers, wounding myself when I had nobody to fight withal. I was born in hell - and look to it, for some of you shall be my father.
- Christopher Marlowe
All beasts are happy,
For, when they die,
Their souls are soon dissolv'd in elements;
But mine must live still to be plagu'd in hell.
Curs'd be the parents that engender'd me!
No, Faustus, curse thyself, curse Lucifer
That hath depriv'd thee of the joys of heaven.
- Christopher Marlowe
Fools that will laugh on earth, most weep in hell.
- Christopher Marlowe
Isn't it ironic, Richard Parker? We're in hell yet still we're afraid of immortality
- Yann Martel
Any body of men who believe in hell will persecute whenever they have the power.
- Joseph Mccabe
In theory, you're supposed to get
everyone's names and become lifelong friends. I literally had contact with half the kids
here last night, but how in hell do they expect me to differentiate one of my butt-to-butt
dancing partners from another? Am I supposed to randomly rub my buttocks up against
people to see if we've bonded booties before? "Yes, the particular musculature of your
ass does feel familiar. 1 remember you now!" Duh.
- Megan Mccafferty
If I owned Marseilles and Hell, I'd rent out Marseilles and live in Hell.
- John Mccarthy
It was hysterical going to work. I would just walk in and think, 'What in hell? Am I here? What's going on? I'm going to wake up in a minute. I'm in a dream.'
- Jacqueline Mckenzie
I offered them Utopia, but they fought for the right to live in Hell.
- Mark Millar
Be to her, Persephone,
All the things I might not be;
Take her head upon your knee.
She that was so proud and wild,
Flippant, arrogant and free,
She that had no need of me,
Is a little lonely child
Lost in Hell,Persephone,
Take her head upon your knee;
Say to her, My dear, my dear,
It is not so dreadful here.
- Edna St Vincent Millay
Lost in Hell,-Persephone,
Take her head upon your knee;
Say to her, My dear, my dear,
It is not so dreadful here.
- Edna St Vincent Millay
It's all my fault! Everything is my fault and no one knows it more than me. We're all in hell and I'm the one that put us here.
- Katja Millay
Spartans... tonight we dine in Hell!
- Frank Miller
I can see you are a fine lady, but this boy is randy as a goat around you and it's plain to see. If he seeks the joys of wedded bliss, he can wed you. Without a weddin' he'll be havin' no bliss.
- Karen Marie Moning
I figure the folks that are the most interesting get to go to heaven. I mean, if I was God, that's who I'd want there with me... I'd rather be a superhero in hell than an angel in heaven. What the feck would I do all day if I wasn't kicking demon ass?
- Karen Marie Moning
The entire time I'm burning in Hell, I'll regret each tear I made you weep. But if Hell were the price for twenty days with you, I'd condemn myself again and again.
- Cian MacKeltar
- Karen Marie Moning
Good night, Lisa. Sleep with the angels."
Her eyes stung from quick tears. It had been her mother's nightly benediction: Sleep with the angels. But then he added words her mother never had: "Then come back to earth and sleep with your devil, who would burn in hell for one night in your arms.
- Karen Marie Moning
I shall tell you where we are. We're in the most extreme and utter region of the human mind. A dim, subconscious underworld. A radiant abyss where men meet themselves. Hell, Netley. We're in Hell.
- Alan Moore
Reverend Father is the only kind man I ever see. When I arrive here I believe it is the place he warns against. The freezing in hell that comes before the everlasting fire where sinners bubble and singe forever. But the ice comes first, he says. And when I see knives of it hanging from the houses and trees and feel the white air burn my face I am certain the fire is coming.
- Toni Morrison
The freezing in hell that comes before the everlasting fire where sinners bubble and singe forever.
- Toni Morrison
I used to think that teachers who gave homework on weekends should be forced to grade papers for an eternity in hell.
- Mike Mullin
In my childhood I always felt that I was treated unjustly, without a mother, sick, and with the threat of punishment in Hell hanging over my head.
- Edvard Munch
I have no fear of photography as long as it cannot be used in heaven and in hell.
- Edvard Munch
I learned early about the misery and dangers of life, and about the afterlife, about the external punishment which awaited the children of sin in Hell.
- Edvard Munch
Yes. We will live the rest of our lives in hell. It's not so bad: as long as you're prepared for it, you can live anywhere.
- Mizuki Nomura
When sorrow comes, they come not single spies, but in battalions. I've allies in heaven, Jack, i've commrades in hell...say hello for me..
- James O Barr
[Writing about her address to a ladies club]: The heart of my message to them was that they would all fry in Hell if they didn't quit reading trash.
- Flannery O Connor
I hate doctors! They'll do anything... to keep you coming to them. They'll sell their souls. What's worse, they'll sell yours, and you never know it till one day you find yourself in hell.
- Eugene O Neill
To see the madness and yet walk a perfect silver line.... That's what the true story-teller should be: a great guide, a clear mind, who can walk a silver line in hell or madness.
- Ben Okri
They seek him here, they seek him there
Those Frenchies seek him everywhere
Is he in heaven or is he in hell?
That demned elusive Pimpernel
- Emmuska Orczy
We seek him here, we seek him there, Those Frenchies seek him everywhere. Is he in heaven? - Is he in hell? That damned, elusive Pimpernel?
- Baroness Orczy
There'll be a special place in hell for the tape back-up people.
- Adam Osborne
Marines are very good at fighting... And if Gen. Franks wants fighters on the ground and he puts Marines in, he'll have what he wants.
- Peter Pace
Some poems are written great, some poems are written swell. But then there are poems that could win a prize in Hell.
- Stanley Victor Paskavich
If there's a place for me in Hell I hope it's next to someone like you
- Stanley Victor Paskavich
In time of war, the Devil makes more room in Hell.
- Sharon Kay Penman
I think the damned souls in hell must spend half their time wondering what it was that they really meant to do.
- Elizabeth Marie Pope
Tom Chaney would pay for this! I would not rest easy until that Louisiana cur was roasting and screaming in hell!
- Charles Portis
She'd grown up believing in hell in an abstract nightmare way; but west Texas had given her something more concrete upon which to dread the afterlife.
- Cherie Priest
The cool thing about being best friends is that you can make big plans even if there's only a slim chance in hell that they'll ever happen.
- Yvonne Prinz
What in hell are you really made of, Howard? After all, it's only a building. It's not the combination of holy sacrament, Indian torture, and sexual ecstasy that you seem to make of it."
"Isn't it?
- Ayn Rand
It's so much easier to pass judgment on a man than on an idea. Though how in hell one passes judgment on a man without considering the content of his brain is more than I'll ever understand.
- Ayn Rand
She wasn't there. He wouldn't have had to look too closely. She stood out from others like an angel in hell or a rose in a sewer.
- Ruth Rendell
If it were your soul I was after, all the dark Cherubim in Hell couldn't keep me from you... I would have done whatever it took to save you... Even if that meant I had to spend eternity in Hell.
- Sylvain Reynard
I would have done whatever it took to save you.' His voice and his expression were grave. 'Even if that meant I had to spend eternity in Hell.
- Sylvain Reynard
I'm going to be thrown out of Paradise tomorrow, Beatrice. Our only hope is that you find me afterward. Look for me in Hell.
- Sylvain Reynard
I didn't want to be in hell, even for a moment. I sure as hell wasn't going there just to spit in the face of the Prince of Darkness, whoever he might be!
On the contrary, if I was a damned thing, then let the son of a bitch come for me! Let him tell me why I was mean to suffer. I would truly like to know.
As for oblivion, well, we can wait a little while for that.
- Anne Rice
Do devils love each other? Do they walk arm in arm in hell saying, "Ah, you are my friend, how I love you," things like that to each other?...it was a matter of a concept of evil, wasn't it? All creatures in hell are supposed to hate one another, as all the saved hate the damned, without reservation.
- Anne Rice
Hotter than a fuck in hell.
- J D Robb
I was raised thinking I'd burn in hell for being gay, but I didn't have a choice. It's just who I am.
- Jai Rodriguez
Random line from BURNING DARKNESS: Fonda Raine stepped out of the back end of a month in hell a hardened warrior, ready to undertake the most important task of her life: kill Eric Aruda.
- Jaime Rush
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