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Drug Test Quotes

My new employer made me get a drug test, so I ripped off my shirt, flexed my muscles, and said, You suspect me of taking steroids, don't you?
- Jarod Kintz

I'll piss in a cup for you. You can run a drug test on it, or you can drink it.
- Jarod Kintz

My employer made me take a drug test. I got them all the answers right except for Viagra. On that question my mind went limp.
- Jarod Kintz

The other day they asked me about mandatory drug testing. I said I believed in drug testing a long time ago. All through the sixties I tested everything.
- Bill Lee

Did you know that the White House drug test is multiple choice?
- Rush Limbaugh

Substance abuse is a disease which doesn't go away overnight. I'm working hard to overcome it. I did fail my recent drug test. I'm prepared to face the consequences.
- Lindsay Lohan

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