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Football Helmet Quotes

I have a 12:34 representational time dance. I do it at 3:33 every other Tuesday (twice a day). If you'd like to participate in my choreographed dance routine, bring a football helmet and a half empty can of tuna (keeps the stray cats away, because I perform in a gritty, grimy downtown alley).
- Jarod Kintz

Do you even listen to what I say? Would you be able to listen better if you were wearing a football helmet full of chili?.
- Jarod Kintz

If you want to see how fast I run, just give me a football helmet and notice how my helmet collects bug carcasses like a car bumper.
- Jarod Kintz

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